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At least two of my
earlier poems were inspired by a wooded tract
near where I live in suburban Mt. Lebanon, Pa. The wood is an
incongruous feature of the landscape—more wild forest than
park—surrounded as it is by vintage housing and manicured lawns. I
thought it time to write a poem about this anomaly, though I did not
have a clear idea of what I wanted to say. Perhaps this is why the poem
was slow in coming. I sat down many times intending to make progress
writing it without making any progress at all. I began with this first
verse:
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When I walk from my house in the suburbs,
On my way to the trolley stop,
I pass some homes and a playground,
And the wood by the bicycle shop.
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This verse took
certain liberties with the arrangement of local landmarks, but it seemed
to be a good enough opening. Finally, in a single day, 7/20/2007, I
finished the poem. When I employed the island metaphor at the end of the
second verse, I got the idea of using an oasis metaphor at the very end.
I knew that that metaphor would need to be more positive
about the natural world, but that's all I knew. I expected to write more
descriptive verses, but I think I wrote enough to
make the transition from the benign neighborhood and sinister intrusion
of nature, to engaging but mysterious nature and an otherwise bland
environment.
In the interest of
full disclosure, I should say that, however dense the actual wood, it is
not quite the terra incognita of the poem. The wood is
difficult to see into, but one can recognize a small ravine, a chaotic
collection of standing and fallen trees, and a curious collection of
vegetation that includes, improbably, a bamboo grove. Certain patches do
seem impenetrable, though, at least in summer. The tract likely covers
2–3 acres, but “five-acre wood” somehow has a more poetic ring to it.
As first completed,
“that dark,” in verse four, was “the dark,” and “suburban,” in the very
last line, was “provincial.” From the beginning, I wanted to use
“suburban ennui” at the end—I had rejected “worldly ennui” as being too
abstract—but I was unwilling to repeat “suburban,” which had been used
in verse one. Weeks after I thought I was done with the poem, a friend
complained about the first verse. “I've been to about 35 poetry
workshops,“ she said, “and the most common problem is that poems don’t
get going until the third or fourth verse.” She suggested that my first
verse got the poem off to a slow start. I didn’t want to hear this, but
she had a point. By way of helping me find a replacement verse, she
offered a single word: “neighborhood.” I wasn’t sure what she meant by
this, but I did note that the word rhymed with “wood.” By substituting
the current first verse, which I did on 8/12/2007, I could justify
“suburban” in the last line and could use “that dark,” echoing “dark” in
the new line four.
In writing this
poem, a few technical
issues gave me fits. The meter here is freer than I usually employ, but
even the extra freedom I afforded myself did not keep me from rejecting
certain lines as defective. Of what remains, the most problematic phrase
is “domestic tranquility.” I nearly substituted “domesticity,” but the
meter seem off just a bit too much. “Domestic tranquility” may not be
perfect, either, but I liked it enough to leave it in. A last-minute
substitution in the first version of the poem was “wood” for “woods.” Although I
personally almost never use “wood” in preference to “woods,” I was
bothered by “woods is,” which, though acceptable usage, is nonetheless
distracting. Besides—or so I told myself—“wood” suggests something more
like a grove than a substantial forest, which was appropriate. Finally,
there is the use of the word “debris,” which is the perfect word for
what I intended, namely, leaves, and the like, on the ground. I
pronounce “debris” with the stress on the second syllable. In this poem,
the stress must be on the first syllable, however, which it is as some
people pronounce it. I chose not to worry about that.
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